Straightening the factual lines.

It's not a new thing this gig at Mid Century Modern Moms. I've been there since January, I just didn't tell you guys about it, because I wasn't sure I'd be able to keep up the pace, and I'm not good at self-promotion - I've never been able to ask a boss for a raise, ever!

Just thought I'd post that here rather in the comments of my last post, 'cause you might not go back and read them to get my response.

I have to confess that the other thing that's kept me from this blog is Facebook. I sort of feel as though my occasional one line status updates almost feeds my need to share my life with the world. It's a little unsatisfactory though 'cause I have friends on there who are not really friends but who it would be awkward in real life if I didn't accept their Facebook friend request. The etiquette of the cyberage is no less tricky than the etiquette required in the 1800's! (And less clear, to boot!)

I think I'm going to be doing a bit more thinking here on my blog again to try and regain some of that elusive satisfaction. Heck, that's why I went to all the trouble of starting a new blog with new names 'n all. Let's see how I go.

Maisy - who loves her cyber friends.

For the Fans

(That would be you Alicia!)


Let it be known that I blog every Wednesday over at Mid Century Modern Moms about the fun of parenting teenagers!

http://mid-centurymodernmoms.typepad.com/midcenturymodernmoms/2009/10/what-to-say.html

That's the latest offering.

What happened to all those things I churned over all night

We're just back from 3 days of camping. I finally decided not to go too far afield and camped at a beautiful surfing beach in a National Park only an hour or so away. While 'eco' toilets and firewood are at the campsite, campers have to take their own water. Although I'd rather have a shower to wash the salt water off, the upside is that the lack of water puts a lot of campers off, so it's not too crowded which is a big bonus in my books. Rain a few days before we left meant fire bans were lifted so campfires were our night time entertainment.

The vaccination reminder for the dogs arrived the day after my post, so I hadn't forgotten them. I always feel good when I'm proven to be less daffy than I feel these days! As their vaccinations were still current I was able to leave them at the kennels (which was the most expensive part of our little getaway), at least they are washed as part of the service, so they smelled better in the car after we'd collected them than we did!

Not only did I deliver the children's sermon last Sunday, I'm doing so again tomorrow. (Which is why I'm blogging; avoidance and all that!)

I did buy a 21 year old Mazda 121 for Zinni and now I'm enjoying (?) teaching her to drive a stick shift. Zinni has logged the necessary 120 learner driver hours, but still has another 3 months before she can sit her test. If Zinni sits the test in an automatic car (which is what our family station wagon is), she will be restricted to driving automatic vehicles for the first year. In reality though, if she doesn't learn to drive a manual now, it will be much harder as by the time her 12 months of driving only automatic transmissions expires, Zinni will have left home for uni. Truth be known I'm enjoying having a little car to buzz around town in. It's a great little car to drive. It's also a very Zinni car. She didn't want a girly bubble car, so this lime green box is fine by her. This little Lime Splice is the means of me having some freedom from all the ferrying of offspring around next year once Zinni has her licence - without a second car to go with the second driver I'll be driving everyone everywhere anyway!

This is not Zinni's car, but it's the same model. Zinni's is beautiful lime green remember! (And we bought it at a private sale from people who live around the corner from me.)

We didn't go to the Global Carnival because it was raining, which suited my finances just fine!

I also still haven't contacted my widow friend Monica who lives in Sydney. Monica has just passed her 4th mark of this crappy status and I will ring her next week, for she too is on holidays and the chances of me being able to catch her at home are increased.

So, there's the wrap up of last week's worrying.

When we arrived home from camping (where we were out of phone range), I found a message on my answering machine from my dear friend Will who was best man at our wedding and who gave an hilarious and gut wrenching eulogy at Rob's funeral. Will's younger brother died on Wednesday, aged 40, less than a week after being diagnosed with cancer.
He had cancer in his lungs, liver, kidneys and probably bone and brain. How can this insidious disease take over so completely with no outward signs? Another family sinks into the morass of grief as they try to remember how and why to breathe.

Churning thoughts, elusive sleep.

I couldn't sleep last night. There was no particular reason, there were just too many thoughts demanding attention that popped to the surface of consciousness each time I was about to slide into slumber. To combat their attention seeking, at 4 am I picked up a pen and paper and wrote them all down, in the hope I would sleep knowing I could continue worrying about them when I woke, because they were written down.

Here they are:

What should I put in Davey's lunch box tomorrow?

Where should we go camping in the holidays? (2 weeks holidays begin this weekend.)
Will the bushfires prevent us camping in several possible sites?
Have I taken anything out of the camping equipment tub and not replaced it?

Where will I leave our dogs while we're away?
Are their vaccinations up to date? I can't remember, but I don't remember having them vaccinated this year, and I'm sure I would if I had! Did I ignore the reminder from the vet? Where did I put it? Is there a horrible pile of paperwork hidden somewhere? Are my dogs suffering too much from lack of consistent exercise? Bugger that husband of mine for dying. Even the dogs are missing out.

Will we be able to light a fire if we go camping? Is it worth going if we can't?

What should I put in Davey's lunchbox tomorrow?

I have to pick up our car from the panel beaters, have I set the alarm early enough? Will I still have time to make something for Davey's lunch?

Should I buy the little manual car we looked at for Zinni so she can learn to drive a manual? Is it too expensive? Can I afford it? Will I find a reliable car cheaper than $1800? Do I need to have a mechanic look at it? Why? I know what an engine should sound like! I know what rust looks like! Would Matt (mechanic, nephew, 21 years old) mind looking at it for me? Would it make him feel important, loved, needed, or just annoyed? If I don't buy this car, how will Zinni ever learn to drive a manual? Am I an idiot? Is the car good value?

Should I be concerned about the assessment changes mooted by Zinni's school for her final year? Will it adversely affect her? Will it positively affect her?

Will I keep this car after Zinni leaves home so Davey can learn to drive a manual? How will I run 2 cars? Am I an idiot?

Why can't I remember to trim the dog's nails more frequently? Why don't I bath them more often? Because I'm an idiot?

Why can't I go to sleep?

What am I going to give Davey for lunch tomorrow?

What am I going to talk about in Sunday's children's sermon? Why did I take this on? Will I be able to organise someone to do the talk for the middle Sunday of the holidays? Should I just do both talks?

Will we go to the Global Carnival on Sunday? Can I afford that and a new car? If I don't go will I hate myself for missing this fabulous music festival? Gee it's annoying that I'm stuck doing the children's sermon when I'd rather be getting to the Global Carnival early. Will Davey be ok to go to the Carnival after paintballing on Saturday? Did I do the right thing agreeing to let him go paintballing? Will he enjoy it?

Will Zinni cope with ex Prince Charming be there? Why did he turn out to be such a toad? Why can't I stop wanting his mother to see she's a total idiot? Why do I care? Still?

Why haven't I contacted Monica for the anniversary of her husband's death? I'm a lousy friend. I hope she's ok. I suspect she's not. Life is difficult for her - so many things to juggle.

Why don't I go to bed earlier? Why is Zinni so noisy when she goes to bed? Why am I unable to sleep until Zinni goes to bed? Why am I unable to go to sleep after Zinni goes to bed? I am an idiot.

What am I going to give Davey for lunch tomorrow? Will I have time to pack my own lunch?


I churned over many other topics, but, these were the ones I wrote down!

As the sun came up I did succeed in finding sleep.